Today I experienced an enormous failure from being overworked. Yet, this morning I poured over the woman of Proverbs 31 and thought to myself I should really work harder.
I would like to presume that by extending grace to others, I could then best understand God's Grace toward me. Not so. Instead, by recognizing my weaknesses in what seems to be one of the worst weeks of my life, I am utterly in awe of His Incredible Grace towards me. I would rather digest such information through my pure intellect--I would like to believe that I am wise enough to learn lessons without experience. But this is not how He operates. His strength is made perfect in my weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9).
I would like to meet the robot-of-a-person who has found the good balance of life without becoming a complete basket case at some point. I would like to meet the man who knows not failure or shame.
That is what I'm working so hard to find. The Perfect Balance.
Humble yet confident.
Optimistic yet reasonable.
Artistic yet organized.
Kind yet strong.
Approachable yet respectable.
Free-spirited yet relatable.
Passionate yet rational.
Hard-working yet at peace.
Perhaps, however, God does not ask for a balanced life. The One who lived the perfect balance was punished for the sin of the world. He who was perfect laid His life as a ransom for all. Balanced? I think not.
Perhaps, instead, God works in the paradoxes of our lives. Perhaps our goal is not to find the balance. Perhaps all of this chaos and lack of balance exists to establish that our goal is to find Him.
I would like to meet the robot-of-a-person who has found the good balance of life without becoming a complete basket case at some point. I would like to meet the man who knows not failure or shame.
That is what I'm working so hard to find. The Perfect Balance.
Humble yet confident.
Optimistic yet reasonable.
Artistic yet organized.
Kind yet strong.
Approachable yet respectable.
Free-spirited yet relatable.
Passionate yet rational.
Hard-working yet at peace.
Perhaps, however, God does not ask for a balanced life. The One who lived the perfect balance was punished for the sin of the world. He who was perfect laid His life as a ransom for all. Balanced? I think not.
Perhaps, instead, God works in the paradoxes of our lives. Perhaps our goal is not to find the balance. Perhaps all of this chaos and lack of balance exists to establish that our goal is to find Him.
I love this, Haley. I struggle with the same situation - how to be kind, but not to be a walked on carpet, how to get my point across without being totally unreasonable considering other's point of views. I find it totally interesting that we must focus on our weaknesses in order to pursue and find Him. I truly believe that as I find Him, the Lord of all will make those things more balanced as I am encompassed by His mercy and grace. I pray the same for you. Don't be discouraged - take heart and try not too be too hard on yourself. Remember, God is not that hard on you =) [advice I should take myself =)]
ReplyDeleteWow, just followed your link from brookefraser.com and I have to say, I'm super impressed with this writing! Great job...and such a great point amidst a grey topic! Keep writing!
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